This doesn’t mean being evasive, though; in fact, directness and honesty are valued. While there’s an element of caricature to this description, Robin Westberg, a trainee nurse from Oslo, says that it’s “rare” for a couple in Norway to wait longer than a few casual dates to have sex. For as long as dating culture has existed, there’s been an expectation to “wine and dine” your partner. Receive weekly inspiration and travel stories from solos just like you.
Instead of feeling like a pawn, they get to assert their own sexual agency. And rather than being meaningless, it may even create room for greater emotional resonance. But when it comes to actually forming a relationship, the time frame becomes more leisurely. Here, you’ll most likely meet in a bar or via Tinder and then move quickly to the sex part.
What are typical dates in Norway like
- Instead of feeling like a pawn, they get to assert their own sexual agency.
- Higher executive officer Linn Kristin Sande recognises this experience.
- Just like many other places, Norway is struggling with a sense of displacement felt by a surge in dating apps.
- For her and her friends, a typical series of dates will begin with beers and sex, before graduating to the more serious business of seeing a movie together.
- While there’s an element of caricature to this description, Robin Westberg, a trainee nurse from Oslo, says that it’s “rare” for a couple in Norway to wait longer than a few casual dates to have sex.
“I think we are in a negative circle when it comes to dating, and I can speak on behalf of many of my friends – both girls and boys,” says Robin. Just like many other places, Norway is struggling with a sense of displacement felt by a surge in dating apps. By removing any stigma to having sex straight away, women are “free to decide their own sexuality and sexual needs”, he says.
“From my own experience I meet most guys on apps, and on seldom occasions, I meet them at a party or at a bar,” he says. Michael agrees that Norway’s dating scene comes with the same issues as anywhere. And the flip side of sex not being such a big deal is that people may feel “an unspoken expectation of sex that they are not ready to fulfill”. This is particularly true for women, who historically have been given a passive role in the dating process. We’re way out of the Victorian era now, and yet sex is still often portrayed as a bartering tool in heterosexual dating; something that’s driven by the desire of the man. Norwegians are famously reserved, and so emotional intimacy may come with a higher premium here; proper commitment takes time.
“I think the Norwegian approach can lead to freedom on the dating scene, if you are self-assured enough to go into it with a clear perception of what you want, what you want from the other person, and communicate this clearly,” says Linn. So much so, that Michael was actually taught about casual dating as a concept in one of his first seminars, in a lecture for the university’s entire international intake led by Bourrelle himself. The Norwegian approach to dating shows both these statements to be true. When you remove sex as the endgame of a new relationship, you create a more honest and equal playing field. “It seems like most people, when using the dating apps, go on dates after dates… Many of these people say that they are looking for a girlfriend or boyfriend, but they aren’t. Higher executive officer Linn Kristin Sande recognises this experience. For her and her friends, a typical series of dates will begin with beers and sex, before graduating to the more serious business of seeing a movie together.
“I’ve heard plenty of stories about one night stands that have gone no further despite the efforts of one party,” he says. “I’ve also heard stories of people going on a few dates, having sex and then being ghosted.